"Joy is the realest reality, the fullest life, and joy is always given, never grasped...."

Saturday, April 30, 2011

How soft is your pillow?

Its Friday night (or really Saturday morning) 3am

Ethan 4 yrs old "Sissy, can I sleep in your bed? I can't sleep..."
Me "Why monkey? Don't you want to sleep in your bed?"
Ethan "No. My pillow isn't soft anymore."

Needless to say I relented and let him climb on into my bed. Five minutes later Graham 5 yrs old joined us. We slept contentedly until my alarm went off at 6:20am reminding me I had to go to work today. I looked over and saw two precious boys sleeping all curled up next to me. My heart swelled.


And then the busy whirl of work day activity began. Shower. Teeth. Scrubs. Get Luke 8 yrs old ready for play date this morning. Kiss Goodbye. Drive through town to work. Etc etc etc

And despite it being extremely busy at work the first half of my shift, and an unending to-do list in the forefront of my mind, Ethan's reason for wanting to switch beds kept running through my mind "My pillow isn't soft anymore."

His comfortable nest of a bed. His plush, enveloping, pillow wasn't "soft" anymore. He wanted to leave his bed. He was done with it.

The Lord has been teaching me a lot the past few months about coming out from my comforts and into His. My comforts of home, and my family being nearby, and my secure job, an amazing church family, gorgeous FL sunsets, sushi thats to die for whenever I crave it....my immensely cozy bed (no lie! its my piece de resistance). He has been calling me out from what I have clung to so strongly as my greatest comforts. He's showing me that His comfort. His will. His plan is so far above mine.

He is making my "pillow" not so soft anymore.

The comforts that used to satiate me are no longer as desirable. They aren't as inviting. I want to go to Him...to share His comfort. Its way better than mine.

His ways might not always feel so soft. His ways can be hard, yet He spurs us on.

Paul said "But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed" 2 Cor. 4:7-9

But wait....He doesn't leave it with just that!

Paul reminds us of where it leads us to.

"So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal." 2 Cor.4:16-18

My pillow isn't soft anymore.


.......Is yours?

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